Friday, 29 November 2013

Please Don't Ask Me These Questions!

I love my country Bermuda and my fellow Bermudians. We're friendly people. Beautiful people of all shapes, sizes and colours. But one thing that always gets on my nerves without fail when I return are some of the really dumb questions that I'm often asked. It's true, we Bermudians love to make conversation and most of the time we don't really listen to what we're saying when we say things.

I've thought of a list of questions that I'd most likely be asked upon returning to Bermuda for the holidays.  If you, your granny, your aunty or well-meaning uncle feel the urge to ask any of these questions please refrain from asking and refer to the list of 8 questions below:

List of Questions that I really do not wished to be asked upon return to Bermuda. Answers provided.

1. Do you have cars in Africa? 

A. There are millions more cars in Kenya than Bermuda will ever have.

2. You look like you're eating well. Isn't everyone starving over there?

A. Actually it's pretty easy to stay fed in Kenya. There's always maze, bananas and beans around. Let's drop the stereotype of starvation across the African continent please.

3. Do your children speak African?

A. The language that is spoken here is called Kiswahili. The nationality is Kenyan.

4. How was it when you were up in that mall with all those terrorist?

A. So you're telling me that you want me to recall the worst day of my life while standing on the corner of Reid Street chatting?? Seriously?

5. Have you changed your religion?

A. Ummm..last time I checked no. Have you changed yours? .

6. Are you home for good?

A. What does that even mean? Sounds like a prison sentence to me.

7. Weren't you afraid to move to Africa?

A. First of all, do you refer to Bermuda as North America? Can we name the country for starters? The answer is 'No.'

8. How come you just came from Afri..I mean Kenya and you don't have a tan? Isn't it always hot over there in Afri..I mean Kenya? 

A. Nairobi never gets as warm as Bermuda because of the altitude plus the seasons are switched. Today I'm wearing a scarf and a sweater.

So to my beloved family and friends in Bermuda. Feel free to refer to this list upon encountering me and my family in Bermuda this December. Even if you feel the urge...a strong urge to ask one of the questions on the list. Please, please DO NOT ASK ME THESE QUESTIONS!!

P.S. Somebody just asked me, "And if I do?"


  1. And is it true you meet lions on the streets of the city? ha ha ha

    1. lol Winnie I forgot about that one! Also, "Do giraffes walk around in your yard?"

  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

  3. Joanne... I am in Bermuda, I actually work here. I met your husband a year ago when I came home to Kenya. It happened that I was staying in an apartment owned by your husband's uncle.
    I have seen the ignorance of Bermudian, not to say it's a replica of many others across the world.
    Most Bermudians know nothing of the world other than the enclosed island and shopping places in East Coast of the US. It's sad that the ignorance is even more apparent among young Bermudians... please, do educate them for the sake of all Africans in Bermuda.
    I am a proud Kenyan!
    By the way, I sent you n fb invite which you never accepted.

    1. Hi Anynymous,
      Please remember that black Bermudians are also African and are only separated by the effects of the African Holocaust, better known as the Slave Trade. Today on my blogpost I've hit out at my fellow Bermudians however I can also count on one hand the number of Kenyans who I've met who have heard of Bermuda or who actually know where Bermuda is located. I also have the experience of most Kenyans thinking that one of my parents is white simply because I'm a light-skinned black woman.

      I would love to see Kenyans and other Africans in Bermuda reach out to become friends of Bermudians while living there rather than sticking to their own circles and pointing fingers outside. You may find that you have more in common than not.

      By the way, because of my work on television I rarely accept random friend requests. It is better if you send a fb message along with the request introducing yourself.

      Thanks again for contributing to this discussion and have a great day!

    2. It's simplicity. . . I am glad that you have another day of LIFE, to be asked any question. CLN

  4. Hi Anonymous,
    For some reason your other comment didn't come up on this thread. It was an insightful comment filled with sadness for how you and your wife have been treated in Bermuda because of ignorant people. I hear you loud and clear and am sorry on behalf of my people. I am glad that you wrote it. If you could post it again on this page I'd be greatful so that I'll be able to respond with greater depth and detail.